Thursday, February 23, 2006

Omar Sharif, eat your heart out!



One snowy afternoon in December, me and the Kraut, stormed the old fortress of Domitz. Escorted there by her parents, who managed to endure our adolescent type gigglings with considerable courage.

Built in 1230, this huge fortress could have held the entire population of the little town, and believe me buddy, there is no way you would burrow out of this place.
Forget those tunnels, forget it.

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The English sauntered along in 1620, and er, well sauntered off again.

“Zee English ran away!” screeched the Kraut, giggling madly as we viewed the educational displays of the fort’s history.
“Yessh!” I hissed “But they always come back!” Her parents were very understanding and we all set off to explore the paths that ran round the fortress.

The Kraut led the way.

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She was not pleased when I dawdled, snapping away with me new camera – and she made her feelings known.

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“Hurry up!”

So I did and we completed the circuit and did the tour of the fort’s carefully arranged rooms – we took pictures that were not allowed, and got into trouble. The Kraut took this one.



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We snuck up to the very top level, and while the guide was trying to catch us, took another illicit pic – it’s a long way down. (shot by..CENSORED)



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The snow gave everything a very Dr Zhivago touch, and Britta got the starring role. Drat, why ain’t I a blonde?

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Omar Sharif, eat your heart out, ain’t she a peach?


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Wednesday, February 08, 2006

Polish and nuts



Met the mad Pole on the bus the other day – bad move, should have hidden under the seat.


Don’t get me wrong, Jolenta is a great girl but she’s Polish, and she’s nuts – put it this way, you have to be full of vitamin fortified oats to deal with Jolenta or you end up in hospital.

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Charm itself, much like the Kraut, but you have never seen how one slightly built person can do so much damage in a few seconds.

I used to work with the mad Pole – watching her arrive was a side show in its own right. For one thing she didn’t just arrive, she kinda staggered in.


That’s because Jolenta didn’t wear just one coat, I’m pretty sure it averaged about 3.

In case she got cold you know, and that includes summer.

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Work couldn’t start until she had unwrapped herself, with 3 coats and a shawl or two, it took a bit of time, did that, so me and the other girl used to have coffee and a chat.


Of course it was impossible for the Pole not to add her four groats, and the coats took even longer to come off.

And then, no, no, not work, then the green tea had to be infused. Or rather it was hot water with these weed things floating in the bottom of the pot, like green snakes.


I never drank it, kept to the PG tips thank you.

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Like I said, I met Jolenta on the bus the other day – I think she only knocked over one passenger on her way out.
Pity she didn’t see the chap waiting at the bus stop: he took a dive, hope he didn’t crack his nose too bad. Yep.


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