You tag, me tag, we all TAG ?

Apparently, the Home Office is going to order the tagging of all suspected terrorists, ahh...Muslim terrorists. And tag all the members of their families!

These terrorists are to be held under house arrest, indefinite... without trial and not charged.
But they all get Tagged! And the rest of their family.... All of 'em, cousins, brothers, uncles, aunts, etc. etc. (Oh yeah, and they can’t use phones or the Internet!)

But, even more fruity! Yeah, the Home Secretary has added Animal Liberationists to the list.
And their families, brothers, uncles, aunts, ect, ect
They all get tagged!

If this carries on, and it probably will, other ‘criminals’ or potential criminals (and their families) will also be tagged.

One day so many of us will get tagged we will be walking up and down our local High Street, tags beeping away, with the cops running up and down, trying to round us all up
Depending on what sort of tag we are carrying.
Peachy stuff.

I must stop shooting myself

I shouldn't have done it - I must be mad; I was quite happy writing my epic.
Every now and then, a little polish, a finer choice of adjective, a nicely tuned phrase...AND THEN I WENT AND RUINED IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I got ambitious, I got clever, I blew me lid

I obtained this little paperback entitled 'How to write a Synopsis' and it tells you how to do it.

So now I have the friggin' answers...damn! End of happiness.
I must stop shooting myself

Better things than work

>

Good reason for working on assignment -- the Blog
Good reason for avoiding work - - the Blog
Better things than work -the Blog
Educational activities -Blogging
Fun stuff -Blogging
A pretending to work time -Blogging
How to be nearly busy - read other Blogs

I think we can all agree on that - yep, got that sussed

The Holy Beckhams! Argghhhhhhh

Becks waxwork vandal discharged

A law lecturer who destroyed a nativity scene at Madame Tussauds featuring David and Victoria Beckham has been conditionally discharged for 12 months. James Anstice, 39, was sentenced at Bow Street Magistrates' Court after pleading guilty to criminal damage.

The court was told Anstice had leapt over a cordon at the London tourist attraction, pushed the figure of David Beckham to the floor and seized Victoria's head.
Speaking outside court, Anstice said: "I have nothing against David and Victoria Beckham - I have no opinion on them really.
"I have done my bit in the world against crap but I do not think I am going to get involved in any more protests."

This man is a Hero!! He should be rewarded, God damit...come to think of it, why didn't God get mad about it ?

Woman Bins Dead Dad

Woman bins dead dad to draw his pension BERLIN (Reuters) -

A German woman hid her father's corpse in a rubbish bin for three years so she could collect his pension and old age benefits, police say. Police became suspicious after the woman, 55, failed to give a credible account of her father's whereabouts following a routine check by local authorities. "She was eventually asked something along the lines of 'So is he buried in the garden?'" said a spokesman for police in the western town of Krefeld. "And she said, 'no, he's not in the garden, he's in the rubbish bin out back."

Well, I guess she put the cops straight then......silly buggers, going for that old line, the garden indeed! Goes to show though, their rubbish collection is garbage!

Lets hear it for Jane !

With gloom and a fervent desire not to see yet another costume event, it happens to be ‘Vanity Fair’, I would like to ban these bloody things.

It is a disgrace to the authors, and my gripe is the ceaseless trail of BBC generated programmes. Consider the lovely Jane.
The BBC have managed to traduce the fine writing of Jane Austin, who is submerged into prettiness by the Corporation’s morons.

I accuse the swine of the BBC, of feeding us a sickly diet of beautifully costumed actors, sitting in exquisitely lit 18-century rooms, and filmed against a backdrop of some of the finest houses that England still has.

Well bollocks to them all, it has naff all to do with Miss Jane Austin, with her sharp wit, with her crystal intellect, with her mastery of the use of language.

Every single writer on this planet should be made to read her, in order to understand that each word counts, that each sentence can be an exquisite creation.

Instead we have Colin Firth in a wet nightshirt pretending to be sexy Mr Darcy.

I rest my case.

Ever been a pole dancer?

What is it about Interviews that induces a sense of permenant coma? Why don't they tell it like it is? HUH?
Instead of 'Thank you for coming' WHY DON'T WE HAVE THE TRUTH?

Like..... 'Really want a job hey? Ha ha ha haaaaa'

Instead of "Tell us why you think you could do this job?"

'BEG! BEG!'

Instead of "Tell us a little about yourself"

Like ' Ever been a pole dancer ?'

I don't mind living at the jobcentre - its an occupation

Plonkers!

Germaine Greer /BBC News
The doubts of friend and foe were confirmed when feminist author and broadcaster Germaine Greer walked out of the Celebrity Big Brother house on the sixth day of the reality television show: what was she thinking of?
She once said Big Brother was "as dignified as looking through the keyhole in your teenage child's bedroom door".
And, explaining her decision not to enter the I'm a Celebrity jungle, she declared: "My nightmare would be having to endure the twittering of a bunch of has-beens and wannabees, interested only in themselves and how they come across."


Oh come on............don't be a plonker! We all know how moronic Big Brother is.....its for plonkers, and now its for famous plonkers.
Just goes to show, how fame softens the brain
I ain't famous, but I'm not a plonker.

The Hell of Tescoe's

It being a Saturday, needs must, for I to brave the hell of Tesco’s... fighting me way through the hungry hordes, my ears are constantly being bombarded by eldritch shrieks of
“Waa..yne. come ‘ere you little bleeder. WHAT did I tell yer about wandering orff?”

Usually the shrieks erupt right behind me, and it takes all my considerable nerve not to shriek myself.
“Taa.nya, git along and No you can’t have any (ok the entire shelf of sweets) WHAT did I say, do yer want a hiding?”
Any sensible child will answer in the negative.

I look round expecting to see some old bat of 101, but no its some young thing of 20 or nearly 20.
Chewing some substance that will undoutably rot her teeth , before she makes it to 22, promises of violence can be heard all the way to the check out

Whats the matter wiith the English, why do they have to yell at their young, as though they are all stone deaf? At this rate the little kiddies will be 10 year old deaf mutes.
Perhaps thats the whole idea.

Take Six Cows

I have this theory... what happens to the brains of councilors , do they put ‘em in the bank vault or summat?

Desirous of preserving some interesting grass, (no no you don’t smoke 'em) a local council wants to prevent six cows from eating these ..er ...interesting grasses.

In my local paper today AND I quote “ it was quintessentially English’ that the committtee should take so long (six years) to deliberating how to contain six cattle.”

The latest solution is, ‘electric fencing’........but mercifully for the rest of us who live in this green and pleasant land, the councillors thought we might get a......(wait for it) A SHOCK!

If anyone thinks they are in danger, contact me for further details.

Toes for Thought Said Fred

Fergie defends Harry over Nazi gaffe
14/01/2005 17:13LONDON (Reuters) - The Duchess of York has defended her nephew Prince Harry for wearing a Nazi uniform at a costume party, calling him "a very good man", but Prince Charles is reported to be "incandescent with rage" with his youngest son.
Fergie, former wife of Prince Andrew who herself has been the target of media criticism in the past, said Harry made a mistake but should not be pilloried for it in the press.
Fergie, who made headlines during and after her marriage to Andrew -- most memorably when she was photographed in 1992 having her toes sucked by her financial adviser John Bryan while on holiday in France -- said she felt "very strongly" about the treatment meted out to Harry.

Well, as my good buddy zaphod remarked, Harry is a prick, worse than that, Harry is a royal prick, and how can how anyone can be so stupid? On the other hand...the rest of that family is so stupid, I guess he’s living up to his heritage.
And ranting on, if I wuz Harry, wouldn’t be so happy about having Fergie’s support....don’t remember her being so clever when it came to not making a prat of herself. Of course it did make ‘toes’ very popular for a time.....hmmmm
toes for thought is that

Let's Get a Few Things Sorted

Ok, lets get a few things sorted...Like I'm not a bloke
I like the name 'Fred'
And me Hair ain't red
I just like the pic.....I don't look like that either.



Except when it comes out of a bottle - I like stuff out of a bottle, the alcoholic kind ( and where the hell is the spell checker?) its taken me five minutes to look the damn word up: once I bought a dictionary, it was called 'The Dictionary of Perfect Spelling'

Complete and utter waste of bloody time... you hafta to be able to spell to use it. So I'm back to crawling through me 'Collins English Gem' the handy size , jesus the print size is small, do I have a telescope nearby?
I have many Rants - there will be more.