It’s a damn good thing that the summer season of sandal wearing is nearly at an end. A sentiment that blokes will never understand, and that includes those weirdoes who wear socks with sandals.
The number of times some wanker in his size twelve’s has stood on my bare toes, this summer, is past counting. As I hobble off the bus, I mutter imprecations that would make their cotton socks curl up and die.
And top of my list is the friggin’ dickhead, that told me to stay cool; for God’s sake, why do these blokes spend all the seasons of the year, in their clumpers?
Anyone would think they were going off to Boot Camp.
If I ruled the world, they would all be on a survival course, and none of ‘em, would sodding survive.
So fair warning to the next idiot who stands on my feet, and crushes all ten toes to pulp. I am going to thump him in the balls, so hard, he won’t be standing upright for the next fortnight.
And his girlfriend can go on retreat, as she won’t be seeing any action out of him, in the foreseeable future.
Can’t say you haven’t been warned, can you, so be bloody careful if you get on my bus, really friggin’ careful.
Yep.
10 comments:
'Gulp!'
Of course, there's another side to this story.
Maybe if you weren't a little person blastin' yer way off the bus like a meteorite, you wouldn't get under the feet of us normal-sized peeple... *runs away sqeaking in high voice*
I can assure you, you sqeaky voiced minority, that there is nothing normal (contrary negative) about your feet, as I judge you to be one of the size twelve platter-feet. Don't get on my bus, is my warning. *gimlet glare*
perhaps what wiv you being so short,they never actually saw you. ???
I am NOT short, I am disadvantagely tall; watch it, zaphod, or I shall do unspeakable things to your toaster
*smile*
You're victim of not just an inconsiderate wanker in clonkers, but also you're a victim of the double standard used for the way women dress. We're supposed to look dainty and wear seasonal clothes, etc., etc., but then, the men applying the double standard feel free to ignore the fact that you've made the effort to be very pleasing to the eye, and he stomps on your toes. asswhole.
Go ahead and thump 'im in the balls next time. thump his again for me.
and I'm with you re the socks and sandals...WTF?!?
Lil Sis puts it so well - as for the socks with the sanddals brigade? They should be shot, yep, thats the answer.
You gotta admit there's sump'n kwintysentially English about a man in grey socks 'n brown sandals - 'specially during Wimbledon week.
The crowning glory is, of course the white knotted handkerchief *somewhat discoloured* knotted over a balding pate.
It really does tell the world *Up Yours, I'm Eccentric 'n I'm English!*
Hmm...I see that our Sarge, is a member of the socks an' sandals brigade.
No doubt he also owns a pair of old and grey, an' very baggy shorts...*choke*
There is nothing wrong with baggy shorts - far more desirable than droopy knickers *haw, haw*
Besides, mine are a fetching shade of khaki... wot show off my manly knees a treat!
I think the exposure of 'manly' knees should be made a criminal offence, *nods firmly*
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