Some of us stand in a queue, no problem; buy the stuff, no problem. Bloody well never happens to me.
Every time I join the queue for the cash desk, all the lunatics in the world come out. (for you Yanks, that’s ‘the line’)
God’s sake, it’s my lunch hour, and all I want to do is buy some friggin’ coat hangers.
The sort of useful/essential thing, a bloke goes out to buy, and I’d like to find the guy who dares to query me.
If that’s you, bog off.
What do I get? First off, a dotty old lady who has a thing about carrier bags.
I’ll give her ‘Bags’ if she ever joins my queue again. There she was, deciding what size bag she wanted for her dish rack. Not a big bag you understand, nope, she wanted a smaller bag.
Yes, you’ve guessed it, the bloody dish rack was bigger than the friggin’ bag.
The cashier gets loony lady to take a bag that fits the blasted thing. But, amigos, that’s not the finish. It is not. The loony wants the bag made smaller……
Give me an axe, please God, give me a nice big axe.
With much use of tape, the cashier does something to the bag; I know what I’d do, and it won't be the bag that gets it.
My coat hangers? They are large, they are made of wood – and as for you, you dotty old lady...
I’m gonna wrap ‘em round your neck, if you ever stand in my line again.
Yep.
5 comments:
Oh dear...so much fuss over a bit of shopping. You should have strangled the old biddy...works every time.
What a good idea....the perfect solution, um....it IS legal, ain't it?
Oh dear,"queue rage" raises its ugly head. I'd beginning to worry about your relation to shopping, RF. Seriously I thought it was just me that invariably got stuck in the queue with the problem customer(s)...now if you excuse me I have to find my chain saw!
FYI, "Queue" is now accepted vocabulary out here in the New World, at least on the West Coast. It wasn't so back in the early 80's though.
PS They also use "wanker' quite a bit and this was unherad of 20 years ago: I blame the internet myself.
You may well be right, MadDog;if you hear reports of madwoman with axe, causes breach of peace...that will be me.
Oh the Yanks, got to 'wanker' now? getting very British ain't they?
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