Why is it that blokes start to scream and howl whenever you suggest that a trip to IKEA would be top of the list?
That’s when blokes start to think of something else that must be done, or suggest that the place will be crowded anyway, and let’s go some other time.
Can’t see what the problem is.
It’s cheerful, does mega-catalogues, numbers everything it sells; even tells you which part of the store you find the packs.
Them Swedes don’t leave anything to chance.
Think of those big yellow arrows. 'Go thissa way, not thatta way’.
The only trouble is I always feel that I can’t defy the arrows, and must carry on even when I know that we have just sailed past the stuff I really came in for.
The last time I went there I heard a woman say very deliberately “This time I will buy a colander.”
She seemed to be alone, I couldn’t see anyone. The secret police of IKEA had got to her.
They must be invisible as well.
I suspect that for most blokes, IKEA means that home improvement tasks are coming their way.
Let me tell you something.
THEY ARE SO RIGHT
For once.
Yep.
9 comments:
Here's why I don't go to IKEA: http://self-preservationsociety.blogspot.com/2005/05/ikea-purgatory.html
Hmmm, I don't know why that link broke up. Here it is again:
http://selfpreservationsociety.blogspot.com/2005/05/ikea-purgatory.html
A case of self preservation Mad Dog?
My sister in law is also one of those who goes on and on about how wonderful Ikea is. Actually, I like my sister in law. She only sometimes irritates the bejaysus outta me, like when she doesn't stop enthusing about Ikea. Yes, the same outfit that has succeeded in degrading half of Europe's population into unpaid workers transporting and assembling their furniture. Nay, not merely unpaid workers, but paying for the privilege. And liking it. Oh boy. Religious sects are almost harmless compared to the Ikea principle. Blokes, as the less rational and more emotion driven part of humankind, are merely listening to a healthy gut feeling here. Maybe women should also get into touch with their instincts more.
keeping away from IKEA is definitely self-preservation.
I hear they do food. Is that right?
Dontcha be lured in there wiv food like a hapless puppy, zaphod! Such a crude device, perfectly transparent. Da Kraken is only awytin ta getcha. You din't think da Kraken dwelleth not in Ikea, did ya? With all them boxes of differing sizes Ikea is one of da Krakens main breedin' grounds.
YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!
You can buy very good Swedish meatballs in IKEA, Zap - an' I've niver found any of they kraken creatures in them boxes......
As for blokes and their gut feelings?
The less said about them, the better *bites lip*
Well you niver saw the trapdoor movin' either, until the thing behind it grabbed you by the ankle.
Some scout! *snort*
Did you know the giant Kraken is able to squeeze through any opening the size of a porthole? The thing's right beneath the pile of meatball tins, b'lieve you me!
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